Like a Brick in your Pocket

A couple weeks ago I flew to New York to visit a few friends from college. The following moment has stuck with me since that trip...

As I got to the top of the escalator landing, I couldn't help but notice a small boy about 5 or 6 years old standing with who I can only presume were his mother and grandmother. His hair was sandy blond and he had on a light blue shirt and jean shorts. Yet his clothes weren't what caught my attention, but rather the large tears falling from his eyes.

His grandmother was kneeling on the floor next to him doing her best to console him. Sadly, she was failing. He continued to sob even harder the more she talked to him. I tried to make eye contact with him and give him my best "cheer up" smile but he wouldn't look in my direction. My heart ached for this little boy. I have been in his position countless times. I remember choking up each and every time I have had to say goodbye to friends, my sister and of course how awful it was saying goodbye to my parents in airports. We have all had to say goodbye to someone special in the airport and in life. I believe that it is the hardest thing a person will endure in their lifetime. If you haven't experience either then consider yourself very fortunate.

Seeing that little boy cry, I was suddenly made aware of my own constant grief and sadness that I feel. For the most part, I do a really good job of pretending that everything is fine and my parents are still happily living overseas. My brain knows this is not true but my heart needs to think this in order to get through my days. This image with the little boy brought to my attention the fact that I'll always feel in my heart just like him. I will always have this sadness and pain deep within me. There's no escaping it. I'm not sure if it will ever go away. I don't even know if I want it to go away altogether.

Several months ago my sister forwarded me the following conversation from the movie, "Rabbit Hole". I think that these lines certainly explain to the outsider what it's like going through life after experiencing an intense loss.

From the 2010 film "Rabbit Hole":

Becca: Does it ever go away?

Nat: No, I don't think it does. Not for me, it hasn't - has gone on for eleven years. But it changes
though.

Becca: How?

Nat: I don't know... the weight of it, I guess. At some point, it becomes bearable. It turns into
something that you can crawl out from under and... carry around like a brick in your pocket.
And you... you even forget it, for a while. But then you reach in for whatever reason and -
there it is. Oh right, that. Which could be awful - not all the time. It's kinda...

[deep breath]

Nat: Not that you'd like it exactly, but it's what you've got instead of your son. So, you carry it
around. And uh... it doesn't go away. Which is...

Becca: Which is what?

Nat: Fine, actually. 

Tina Fey and Steve Martin

Guess who I saw last night?!

Tina Fey is awesome! Seriously, I can't get enough of her. Last night I had the pleasure of seeing her talk about her newly released book, "Bossypants" and how she got into the entertainment industry. It was an interview/conversation between her and notoriously funny actor, Steve Martin. FYI, he hasn't changed a bit! Ok, so maybe he has a full head of gray hair now but I think it's been like that for awhile but he still is warm and hilarious!

While I've known for a long time just how funny he is, I wasn't fully aware of Tina Fey's comic genius. Sure, I've seen her on SNL plenty of times and of course seen some of her movies. Have you seen "Mean Girls"? It's one of my favorite movies ever and she wrote it! But there's really nothing like seeing someone live talking in front of you.

Tina Fey is so witty and charming. I couldn't help but feel like she was just sitting in her living room having a fun chat with all 5,000 of us sitting in the Nokia Theater in downtown LA. She and Steve Martin worked very well together and seemed to honestly get along and often made each other laugh up on stage. I'd also like to add that she is as funny as she is pretty. I love her effortless look and even with a little pregnant belly, she still managed to appear in great shape. She had on the cutest leopard print heels! : )

I hope to read her book very soon. Have you read it? What do you think of these two entertainers?

Biutiful

Last Friday night I saw Biutiful. "Biutiful is a love story between a father and his children. This is the journey of Uxbal, a conflicted man who struggles to reconcile fatherhood, love, spirituality, crime, guilt and mortality amidst the dangerous underworld of modern Barcelona." I found this description online and really couldn't have explained it better myself. This dark and haunting film really shook me to the core and I still haven't been able to get the images from it out of my head.

I don't want to give too much away since I hate when others do that. All I'll say is that several scenes in the movie really hit home with me and I found myself tearing up more than usual during the film. Thank goodness I heard lots of sniffles all around me. Even after getting home from the theater, I still felt an intense sadness and I couldn't even be around people. So I said goodnight to my roomies and went to bed fairly early.

For the record I didn't know what this movie was going to be about. I had a feeling it would be in Spanish meaning that there would be subtitles but that wasn't a big deal to me. Despite how melancholy I felt after seeing the movie, I don't want to be the type of person that refuses to see movies because of how they might make me feel afterward. I don't want to be that sensitive. Plus, I think there was a part of me that needed that kind of release on Friday. I needed it and therefore I don't regret seeing it.

Have you seen "Biutiful" yet? What did you think about it? Javier Bardem truly is an amazing actor-he can do anything! Are there movies that you've seen and just can't get out of your head and quite simply, just won't see again if at all?

Update on the filming...

Yep, there is officially some serious filming going on in front of my house and they will be here for another week and a half! At first, I thought, hey, that's kinda cool, my street and neighborhood will be in a movie, but now it's starting to get annoying.

For starters, the crew isn't nice at all and they don't even smile when we walk past them! Geesh! They are infringing on our home not the other way around! Secondly, their trailers and cars take up the entire space right in front of our house so parking has been pretty annoying and a bit difficult to find. Lastly, they begin working bright and early at about 6AM every morning and don't stop till 8ish at night. Next week, they are going to start working at 3AM! UGH! Yes, they did have the courtesy to put a note on our gate last week to let us know their schedule.

I'm not sure if I should tell you what the movie is called that they are filming but I will tell you that one pretty famous actor is in it. Perhaps, we'll catch him right outside our front door one of these days. Don't worry, I'll be sure to blog all about it.

"Only in LA"

Yep, I got another one already! Well, technically, this happens in New York all the time too but whatever.. I'm still using it for my "Only in LA" series.

This morning I awoke to find brand new "No Parking" signs on my street. They are simple ones just telling us not to park on that side of the street. I am told they are filming signs and that soon, once they narrow down the exact location for filming, new signs like the one on the left will be posted. Pretty cool, huh?

Well, it is neat until it starts annoying me that I can't find parking anywhere. Let's hope they don't shoot a lame commercial and it's a cool new movie featuring let's say.. Bradley Cooper or perhaps a new music video by Beyonce. Now let me go move my car! : )

Stay tuned!

Premiere of "Only in LA" Series

Welcome to the premiere of my "Only in LA" series. From time to time, I will blog about things that I see and hear here in my city. Feel free to steal this blog idea and change it to fit your own city.
So, here we go...

"Only in LA" will you overhear conversations like this one:

Aspiring Actor's Gym Buddy- "So, how's work going? Anything new come into the agency?"

Aspiring Actor- "Yeah, actually today this guy walked into the agency and said he just finished a horror script and he wrote it with me in mind as the lead!

Aspiring Actor's Gym Buddy- "Very cool. Who is the writer? Anyone I know?"

Sadly, I wasn't able to catch the rest of this conversation as they were walking into the gym and I was leaving it and I really couldn't walk any slower than I already was without appearing a tad creepy. I already felt like a huge eavesdropper but in my defense, they were talking really loud!

Stay tuned for more "Only in LA"!!

Quick thought

Just a quick thought for the day:

Watching movies and shows that take place in LA are so neat now. I know this may make me sound like a big dork but I think it's fun to now watch them and know exactly what area the actors are in or talking about. It's even cooler now that I'm getting to know this city better.

A couple weekends ago, I met up with an old high school friend that I hadn't seen in 12 years and I drove her around West Hollywood, the Sunset Strip and into parts of Beverly Hills. The best part about it was that I didn't really use my navigation system at all. I was able to figure out where we were and where we going all on my own! Yay! Go me! And to think I thought I would never get the hang of this city back when I first moved here. Thank goodness that isn't the case anymore.

Movies & West Hollywood

I love going to the movies. It was always one of my family's favorite things to do during the summers. My mom and I would usually see like every movie out and then my dad would join us for the one or two that he wanted to see in the theater. We didn't even need to get candy or popcorn. We just enjoyed seeing a possibly good movie on the big screen. I have certainly continued the movie-watching tradition with my sister and of course with many friends.

So, today I saw Inception at the Grove with an old friend from college. I know this is definitely not a movie blog at all so I won't begin to discuss this movie at all but I will say that I really have fun at movies like this that actually make me think and even question my own reality a little bit. It was a bit complicated at times but for the most part, I felt like I was totally able to follow along.

After the movie, I took a little drive into West Hollywood. I was actually looking for a Whole Foods grocery store but then ended up taking the long route to get there. Let me just say that West Hollywood is such a cute area and I really would like to spend more time there.

Here are a few interesting facts I just learned about the area:

-In 1985, West Hollywood was the first city to create a same gender domestic partnership registration for its residents, as well as to offer same gender domestic partner benefits for all city employees. Woo hoo!

-City legislation bans the sale of handguns, prohibits smoking in public places, and restricts the city from doing business directly or indirectly (via vendors) with any country known to violate human rights.

-West Hollywood is one of 19 cities in California that has banned the use of gas-powered leaf-blowers.

-This area is the home of about 1,000 dogs per square mile. The city designed a law that pets are to be called "companions" and their owners "guardians" and was the first city in the country to outlaw the de-clawing of cats.

-Because of the large population of homosexuals and the large numbers of same-sex-oriented businesses, West Hollywood became prominently known as a "gay village". The section of Santa Monica Boulevard from La Cienega Blvd. to Robertson Blvd., known as "boys' town," is among the most popular gay neighborhoods in the world, with numerous well-known spots such as the nightclubs Micky's and Rage, and newer bars/restaurants such as Eleven and East|West Lounge.

-West Hollywood, with a homosexual population of about 41% of its total population, has been disproportionately affected by the HIV/AIDS epidemic which has ravaged its male homosexual population since the early 1980s. This is very sad and is exactly why I am running my Half Marathon in September.

Our Favorite Soundtracks!

It's no secret to anyone that knows me that there is nothing in this world that I am more passionate about then music. Music moves me and it gives me meaning in a world that sometimes makes no sense at all. All of my favorite memories in life can be linked to a song. It's a given that I love movies even more when their soundtracks are amazing. An incredible soundtrack can make an otherwise dumb and boring movie spectacular. Wouldn't you agree?

So, I decided to ask my friends what their top 5 all time favorite soundtracks were. Never before have I got so many responses to one of my blog questions before! I loved that I received so many different movies from everyone! In fact, there aren't too many repeats. Guess this means that we are all very different people.

Before I show you what my friends said, here are my top 5 movie soundtracks: Empire Records, Romeo and Juliet, Moulin Rouge, 500 Days of Summer and The Wedding Singer... Garden State, High Fidelity, Aladdin and Brown Sugar are up there for me too. Ok, so I cheated, I can't just pick 5 movies, that's way too difficult.

Now here's what my friends had to say:

• Lion King
• Pretty Woman
• Now and Then
• High Fidelity, Virgin Suicides, Rushmore, Pulp Fiction, Saturday Night Fever
• Good Will Hunting for Elliot Smith, Magnolia for Aimee Mann, Trainspotting for techno, Grease and Little Mermaid historically, and maybe Across the Universe
• 
  
• Love Actually
• Almost Famous
• Lion King
• Pulp Fiction
• Perscilla Queen of the Desert
• Dirty Dancing
• All Disney Musicals!!!
• 
  
• Romeo and Juliet
• The Saint (don't judge me!)
• Van Wilder (again, don't judge me!)
• Baseketball
• The Wedding Singer
• Moulin Rouge
• Batman and Robin (I see you judging!)
• 
  
• Dazed and Confused, and Even More Dazed and Confused (I'm counting them as one because they're from the same movie!)
• Empire Records (of course!!!)
• Garden State
• Romeo and Juliet
• Three-way tie (I'm sorry!): Almost Famous (for when I'm chilling or cooking), 8 Mile (for running), and Last of the Mohicans (for complete relaxing--bath time!)
• 
  
• Waiting to Exhale-best soundtrack ever!
• Love Jones
• The Best Man
• Dreamgirls
• Idelwild
• Boomerang
• 500 Days of summer
• 
  
• Wild Wild West -- First CD I ever bought
• American Gladiators: The Music -- Last tape I ever bought (until last weekend) and the tape that opened me up to what the radio calls "Classic Rock," but what I call that old school, white boy music
• Ferris Bueller's Day Off -- My favorite movie. Also, never actually released, so you have to find all the songs and clips and put the thing together yourself
• 
  
• Clueless - Pretty timeless and fun to listen to today.
• Waiting to Exhale (also timeless)
• Aladdin (who wasn't obsessed when this came out?)
• The Big Chill - Just the best music period.
• Vicki Christina Barcelona (love, love Spanish music)
• I would say Garden State but honestly I liked the songs more than the movie, and now I can only think about the movie, so that annoys me -plus it's like everyone's favorite.
• 
  
• Garden State
• Across the Universe
• Grease
• Dirty Dancing
• 
  
• Waiting to Exhale (BECAUSE IT IS THE BEST. BABYFACE. NUFF SAID)
• Love Jones (Every song is unique and telling, and the poems are awesome!)
• Purple Rain (Duh!)
• Boomerang (End of the Road by Boyz II Men is on it!)
• Crooklyn (Amazing compliation for a seriously great movie!)
• Boyz In the Hood (great tunes, perfectly cemeted within the theme of the movie--Struggle and love for others over love of self)
• 
  
• Romeo and Juliet
• City of Angels
• Dazed and Confused
• Pulp Fiction - Quentin Tarantino is the King of making good movie soundtracks
• Grease - How could you not love it, and who hasn't dressed up as Sandy for at least one Halloween.
• 
  
• Top Gun
• Gladiator
• Jurassic Park
• Back to the Future
• Indiana Jones
• 
  
• Love Actually
• Space Jam
• 50 First Dates
• Anything by Bill Conti and Hans Zimmer
• 
  
• Elizabethtown
• Grease
• Buffy the Vampire Slayer
• Once More with Feeling
• Moulin Rouge
• Pretty in Pink
• Singles
• Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist
• Some Kind of Wonderful
• 
  
• I couldn't just pick five... Music sometimes makes a movie. I have a lot of soundtracks in my collection. Here are my favorites and songs from them soundtrack:
• Grease - This was the very first (vinyl) record I owned, so I played it to death and it will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart
• Garden State - Caring Is Creepy. Introduced me to a genre of music I hadn't spent much time in - independent rock/folk Haunting and beautiful words and lyrics.
• Pulp Fiction - Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon This movie BLEW ME AWAY, I love it and have seen it dozens of times. The music is spectacular and reintroduced me to old favorites.
• Serendipity - Never A Day I love the message in this song and the movie itself. Anything can happen and the universe works in very mysterious ways.
• Pretty In Pink - Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want Reminds of growing up in the 80's and how stupid, painful and exciting high school can be.
• Sliding Doors - Good Enough What can I say, I have a woman crush on Gwenie... I wish I was brave enough to cut my hair that short. Great movie and even better music!
• St. Elmo's Fire - If I Turn You Away The Brat Pack at their best.
• Some Kind of Wonderful - I Go Crazy I miss the 80's!
• Purple Rain - Let's Go Crazy There is something sexy/dirty about Prince that I just can't shake. He is SOSOSOSOSOSOS talented and this was a greta bio-pic. The BEST concert I have ever been to.
• She's Having a Baby - Apron Strings/This Woman's Work - tie Beautiful funny movie about a couple having a baby. I heart John Hughes... this was his best work!
• I also love every single piece on the Moll Flanders soundtrack and both Charlie's Angels soundtracks equally.
• 
  
• The Fifth Element
• Invincible
• Remember the Titans
• Rock Star
• South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut
• 
  
• Empire Records
• Moulin Rouge
• Grey's Anatomy
• 
  
• Cruel Intentions-Bittersweet Symphony
• The Matrix-Clubbed to Death
• LoveActually-Here with Me
• Battlestar Galactica- All Along the Watchtower
• Iron Man-Iron Man
• 
  
• Amores Perros
• Reality Bites
• Pretty Woman
• Habla Con Ella