Now I've finally created the ultimate list of essentials that the perfect guy must have based on all my friend's answers and what I want as well. What do you think of this list? Do you agree? Thanks ladies for all your emails and for letting me interview you in person. I think we all deserve each and every one of these qualities!
(In no particular order)
- Loving/Kindhearted (Loves his family and has a good relationship with them)
- Aim to Please (Mostly selfless)
- Intelligence (He can verbally spar with you and perhaps an expert in something)
- Confident (But not cocky)
- Sense of Humor (Sarcastic without being mean and obnoxious, Someone who can make us laugh everyday because looks fade and that's what we are going to be stuck with when we're 80! And a sense of humor that gels with mine and the ability to laugh at himself)
- Shared Values
- Passion for Life (Ambitious and action-oriented)
- Some musical ability (Or very interested in music)
- Physically Attractive (Nice proportional body and has a few muscles and he has got to be taller/bigger than me and has a great smile and good teeth)
- Sense of Adventure (Enjoys going to new places and trying new things but also doesn't mind an occasional night in)
- Independent (Has his own transportation, job, set of friends, his own hobbies and interests, etc)
- Never acts abusive towards women or loved ones (this is a no-brainer but I love that a friend thought of it)
- Likes/wants marriage/family
- Affectionate (Will show affection in front of other people (Gotta love holding hands but doesn't need to go overboard with PDA)
- Loves me for me (Another basic one but I just had to add it to the list)
- Laid back (He doesn't freak out about the small stuff and can roll with the punches)
- Healthy ( Enjoys a healthy lifestyle)
- Understanding/Supportive/Open (Able to see things from other people's views)
- Handy (Can fix things)
- Worldly (Can't deal with with a home grown boy whose wanted to live in the same town all his life)
- Sporty (Enjoys sports and maybe can play a sport well)
FYI- The most popular traits were sense of humor, supportive, passion for life, understanding and honest. The most unique trait someone said was that he had to be a Republican!
One friend thought this was a harder question than the rest and she told me something that I thought was so true and sweet-
"Ahhhh that is the question. To be honest. There are no characteristics. It's all feelings and connections. Having a list will ruin the perfect guy. Be open to love, every kind of love. It's not supposed to make sense or fit a mold or list."
Another friend gave me this great quote. I absolutely love it and think it's totally true. Find me a guy who can do both and I'll marry him!
"I want a guy that can have hot dogs and beer at the baseball game during the day...then wine and dine me and take me to the Met at night."
Another friend told me the following. I love this friend dearly and I hate that she has had to go through heartbreak. I would really like to kick that dude's ass! For that matter, i would like to kick a lot of guys asses out there that have wronged my friends! Well, what can u do but live it and learn from it.
"It's hard to remain hopeful that someone like this exists (who isn't already married or gay!) I'm becoming more and more skeptical and almost cynical. I never used to be cynical...but I guess that's what heartbreak and disillusion get you!"
Next up, I'm going to ask my guy friends the same question!! Wish me luck!