Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Wise Words?

Today my sister purchased a book, entitled "The Bounce Back Book" by Karen Salmansohn and it's filled with inspiring phrases like this one; "What goes down often bounces back even higher".

I would really love to believe this phrase is true. However, I can't help but wonder, have I bounced back even higher since my parents died? Am I a stronger, more sympathetic and a more adjusted person today? What have I really learned from their passing? How could I possibly have bounced higher? I don't understand...

I get the idea of all this though.. Supposedly, when we are dealt a seriously bad hand, we should somehow be able to rise from it and become even stronger and happier than we ever were to begin with. In spite of the tragedy, we are able to find something amazing in our lives. I don't know about you.. but before the devastating event in my life, I think I was a pretty strong person and was certainly happy with my life. I mean, I got to live overseas for most of my life and then had an awesome college experience. I had no complaints whatsoever! Sure, perhaps I am closer to a few people now then I might have been otherwise but come on, I didn't need my parents to die for that to happen! I am sure that over time I would have become more independent and less naive about the world. In fact, if I'm totally honest with my blogging friends and myself, I'll tell you that I'm not a better person now than I ever was before they died. I feel like there is a huge chunk of my heart missing. That can't be healthy, right? I am definitely more pessimistic about the world. Sadly, I don't look forward to my future as much as I used to when they were still living. The idea of them being grandparents to my kids sent me into a giddy fit!

In Karen's book, she says " that studies have shown that after distressing times, many good people actually reported rebounding to a higher-than-usual good mood. He attributes this bounce-back-higher effect to people appreciating the good in their life after suffering the bad." Well, I can't argue with that logic. When something awful happens to you, you have no choice but to eventually let it force you to really appreciate all the amazing things in your life. I know that I never take for granted any of those precious moments with my family and friends. And I'm always telling people that I love and miss them.
What about you? Do you really appreciate the people that are most important in your life?


  1. dearest Leah,

    maybe at this given moment its too early to determine whether or not this statement is true. Maybe your bounce back effect hasn't had its chance to reach its peak. I have faith that your bounce back will be higher than you could have ever thought.

    Your strength to overcome your devastating loss has made you stronger than you ever thought you were. As Christopher Robin said to Pooh "You’re braver than you believe & stronger than you seem & smarter than you think." This statement for you is truer for you than anyone else I can think of.

    Just know that you have people around you who are here to help you, who are here to help you bounce higher than you ever thought possible.

  2. I love the Winnie the Pooh quote above.

    Bouncing back... Such a cool concept in theory, but a lot harder to actually achieve. I think all the stars must be aligned in order to be successful at it. And you really have to be in the right frame of mind. Cute book with lots of helpful tidbits on regaining happiness.